Sex & Flossing

February 9th, 2011 § 1 comment

Don't forget to floss

Don't forget to floss

Disclaimer: My wife came up with this theory and analogy so all credit belongs to her.

Flossing is easy. It only takes a couple minutes and the benefits can be seen in the short run (better breath) and the long term (keeping teeth, hooray!). Yet we are almost universally resistant to it. I’m tired. I just want to go to bed. I’ll do it tomorrow. I have a headache1. All it takes to overcome these excuses is a couple days where you force yourself to ignore your inner procrastinator and establish a daily routine. Once you do, flossing becomes easy and dare I say enjoyable.

For many women (and some men) in a long term relationship, sex can take on many of the same characteristics. The resistance has many excuses. I’m tired. I just want to go to bed. We’ll do it tomorrow. I have a headache. Yet the benefits are many and can be seen both in the short run (it feels good) and the long term (healthy sex life results in more happiness and lower divorce rate, hooray!). And lets face it, it usually only takes a couple minutes2.

Being the not so closeted feminist that I am I have always chalked this up to the man’s inability to satisfy his partner but I don’t think is as large a factor as I previously believed. My wife did a quick survey of her friends and most of them admitted that momentum (or lack thereof) was more of a hindrance than a lack of pleasure. For the most part her friends also admitted that the floss analogy was painfully accurate.

“If I give in tonight then he is going to want it every night!”

I’m sure that in the moment that seems like a perfectly reasonable argument until you try to answer the question: what is so bad about sex every night? Granted, making anything a daily routine can quickly drain all pleasure from the best of activities and I’m not arguing that some sort of daily sex policy needs to be established. One not need look far to find a couple that had a hard time getting pregnant and subsequently turned sex into something even men found distasteful. All I’m saying is that next time you find yourself being resistant look at your motivations. Are you being resistant for the sake of resistance? Why not acquiesce, have some fun, and save the no’s for when you really do have a headache.

  1. shameless foreshadowing []
  2. present company excluded of course []


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